A Headache From Hell: Part 8

The next three months were a blur for the Soldier. His days revolved around T.V. and pain killers. To some of you I am sure this sounds like a good way to spend some time. To the Soldier it was hell.

He was sent home with a PICC line. This was an IV that went in under his left bicep and traveled up his arm and down directly into his heart. This PICC line was attached to a small machine that pumped antibiotics to him continuously. The pump and antibiotics were stored in a small backpack or "purse" as he called it, and once a day he would have to change out the antibiotics.

The purse was a real pain in the butt. It had about a four foot tube that connected him to the purse. Everywhere he went it came too. On several occasions in the middle of the night he would get up and forget about it. As he made the second step from the bed the purse would fall to the ground. Luckily the PICC line was sutured in place or it would have pulled right out.

As big of a pain this was the headache was much worse. Everyday for the next three months he had a migraine that wouldn't go away. The pain was located right between his eyes. It made any light unbearable. He spent his day laying on his couch with a blanket pulled over his head. He would lay there in and out of consciousness and listen to the TV. He never went anywhere without his sunglasses. Most the time he wouldn't even take them off when his head was under the covers.

Dr. H did every thing he could to get ride of the headache. He tried every combination of narcotics he could come up with. The Soldiers medicine cabinet was looking more like a pharmacy then a cabinet. At least once a week for those three months he would be seen by Dr. H. He believed it was associated with the trauma his brain had went through. Once everything settled down in his brain the headache should go away.

The pain was constant. The pain killers weren't doing a thing so Dr. H started him on Migraine medicines. These didn't touch the pain either. He was given a 10 day supply of Imatrex. These 10 pills were supposed to last a month. After 10 days the soldier went to the pharmacy to get a refill and was told that he couldn't have any more. So Dr. H prescribed him another migraine medicine, but it still did nothing.

About two weeks into the headache him and The Misses started to notice his memory didn't seem to be all there. His long term memory was fine, it was his short term memory that wasn't sticking. Him and The Misses would have conversations at night and the next morning when she would ask, he couldn't remember a thing. Night time seemed to be worse then mornings.

For thanksgiving that year they went to Las Vegas to spend the holiday with The Misses family. One morning they were sitting at a table in a restaurant and The Misses family were complaining about the fire alarm that went off during the night. The Soldier looked at The Misses confused. He didn't remember a fire alarm. They went on to tell him the fire alarm went off and everybody including him was outside for about an hour.

Even worse then that memory laps, one afternoon the Soldier came home for lunch and The Misses was there. They were sitting on the couch eating lunch when she turned to him and said "last night was amazing." "What?" he replied. "You do remember last night?" She said quietly as a tear rolled down her eye. Nothing. He remember nothing. As he drove back to work his eyes welled up. He couldn't believe he couldn't remember.

Mentally, this was probably as low as he had every been in his life. Something was wrong in the Soldiers mind. One night The Misses came home late from work. When she came in and gave him a kiss he accused her of having an affair. The Misses was furious and stormed out of the room. The Soldier went into the bathroom to brush his teeth when something strange happened.

The mirror in the bathroom was divided in three sections. If you looked at it right, you could see three different images of yourself. According to The Misses she got up when she heard the Soldier talking to someone in the bathroom. As she stood next to the door he was looking at one of the images and having a conversation with himself in the mirror. As he would look at a different imagine in the mirror he would have a different conversation with the image as if it was a different personality. She knew what he had to said to her earlier wasn't from the "real" person she was with.

When he walked out of the bathroom she was standing there. He apologized to her and gave her a kiss. Then he moved around in back of her and started talking as if it was a different personality. The misses was scared, but understood what he had said to her wasn't what he meant. He was not right in the head at that moment.

That night The Misses said the Soldier was laying in bed when he asked her a disturbing question. "Do you think it is weird if every time I close my eyes I see a rope around my neck and me hanging there?" He asked out of the blue. This really freaked The Misses out. The next morning she asked if he remembered anything about last night. Of course he didn't.

He called Dr. H that morning and was seen that same day. He explained what The Misses had told him about last night. Dr. H listened and started to talk to them both about the images he would see when he closed his eyes. He was worried about the Soldier. He prescribed him some medicine. Then he talked to The Misses. She wasn't a patient of his, but he was worried about her too. He decided the Soldier should start taking some medicine to help control his emotions.

At this point it had been a month since his hospital stay for listeria. His headache was there everyday for three months. Some days were worse then others. He was taking pain killers every 4 hours and if during the night he didn't wake up to take the pain killers the headache the next morning was almost unbearable.

Thankfully the medicine Dr. H prescribed really helped the Soldiers mood. The images of suicide slowly began to go away and to his knowledge he never had another episode of talking to himself.